ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
Randomize
