ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
