Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
