I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
