just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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