So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
