How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Randomize
