That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
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