it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize