he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
