apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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