It's Friday. Sex?
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
