Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
