Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
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