well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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