eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Randomize
