how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
