Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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