I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
