idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
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