I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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