Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Randomize
