Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
If I had really thought it through, I would have bought some Depends, popped one on and made this night my bitch.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
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