I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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