i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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