if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
She was talking about how a garden gnome was hitting on her the whole night. We thought she was just that high, but turned out the gnome was that guy in the weird hat.
Randomize
