She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
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