he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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