I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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