HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
