Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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