it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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