He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
