so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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