Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
He passed out mid-signature
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
Randomize
