No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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