I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
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