Swine flu. Run for my life!
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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