I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
Randomize
