let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
