This bar receipt from last night makes no sense
You were wasted and got mad that it was too high so you subtracted 50 bucks in the tip line from the total
I wish that would've worked
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
