I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I love how my cats smell like pot.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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