There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Randomize
