I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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