I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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