Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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