We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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