To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
