Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize
