Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
