Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
